You know what’s wrong with society today? Its that there is very little(if any) incentive to actually be a nice/good guy. Yeah, every girl talks about how they want to find a guy who’s different than the rest, someone who’s not just trying to get into your pants, who’s nice, polite, does cute things for you like buy you flowers on a random day, who calls you just to say I love you, blah blah blah…. Right?
But honestly, despite the fact that most guys know girls want these things, we can’t help but react to what we see on a day to day basis. We are constantly reminded that being a “Good guy” is unattractive. Anytime a guy sees a girl he finds attractive, we often find out what type of guy she goes for and it always seems to be the “bad boy.” The dude with nice car, he’s smooth, he has “swag/game,” he’s been with 100 different women… everybody knows what I’m talking about. So if a guy is tryna get with a girl who finds that that kind of guy attractive, of course he’s going to try to appeal to her interests and try to emulate the “bad boy” image. What’s sad is that most girls admit they fall for the bad boy and to be honest they have no one else to blame but themselves. Girls set the standards of expectation in a guy. But what a lot of girls do is place the blame on men… and not only the men they’ve messed with, but they BLAME ALL MEN. You’ll hear them say “why cant guys be like _____?” “why are all guys jerks?”
You know why women fall for the “bad boys?” Its because it easy. Plan and simple. Its easy for a girl to set her standards low and go for the guy who is experienced and has “swag” instead of taking the time to get to know a guy who is more reserved and not in your face tryna “spit game”
Let me tell you one thing, All “bad boys” have one goal… and it’s to fuck. They’re Players; Trust me I know, I’m friends with most of these guys and I’m around them to know what their ultimate goal is. So before EVER getting involved with someone you need to ask yourself one question. What do you want out of it? If you’re just looking for someone to get butt naked with and do the nasty, then that’s fine, just make sure the goal is mutual. But if you’re looking for a serious relationship with someone then don’t expect that from a “bad boy” or player.
A bad boy’s intentions will always be selfish. The reason he will pursue a relationship with you is always about what he can get out of the relationship and how the relationship benefits him. Nice guy’s intentions always revolve around his lady’s happiness. He will gain all satisfaction for just putting a smile on your face and that alone is enough for him to be in a relationship with you. My advice, if you find a guy like that, hold on to him and appreciate him and remind him how great he is. Inspire him to greatness. The second you take him for granted, he will loose all motivation to make you happy, and the relationship will fail..
Final word is: If you’re unhappy about what you keep finding, then try changing what you’re looking for :)
Intelligence- Definitely one of the most important things I look for. I’m passionate when it comes to this. If a woman cant stimulate my mind and make me think, if she cant hold an intellectual conversation with me… things are going to get dull real quick. I like a girl who is intellectually independent, I don’t want to have to explain every simple thing to her, or make decisions for her because shes not smart enough to figure out what she wants. I look for a girl who can teach me things, someone I can learn from. Smart = Sexy.
Trust- This is prob the one that kills most relationships, and is why I think it’s the most important to have. Trust goes both ways… I need a girl not only that I can trust, but who trusts me the same. And when I say trust, I’m not only taking about being faithful, I’m also taking about trusting my word.
Honesty - Definitely goes with trust but still needs its own section. Basically how I feel is, Dont ever lie to me… ever! Once you lie to me, and I find out, you loose all credibility. Never again will I have full confidence you are 100% truthful with me. Which in-turns results in lost of trust.
Respect - I hung out with a girl the other day who really opened my eyes when it came to this. Every time she answered one of her parent’s question, she ended with a “yes sir” or “no ma’am” That right there says a lot. I’m not saying I need a girl who does that, but what Im saying is a girl who shows that much respect to her parents must give the same level of respect to a significant other. I feel a girl like that will also DEMAND that level of respect back, which is a plus cuz if you don’t respect yourself, how can I expect you to respect me…
Class- I don’t want a girl that’s easy. If you’re easy with me then you were prob easy with all the other dudes you only dated once. That shit aint cute ma. And since I’m not the type of dude just to date you to get in your pants, I’m not down with loose women. Nuff said.
Sense of Humor - pretty self-explanatory. Make me laugh, we good. Laugh at me, we good too haha ;)
Looks - Not the most important but nonetheless still important. Nobody wants to feel turned off just by looking at someone, at least I don’t. I have to have some level of physical attraction, especially when getting intimate or showing affection. If I’m scared when looking at you in the morning when I wake up, it’s not going to work haha
Hygiene - Thought about adding this the “Looks” section but I think its different. Looks is obvious, its how attractive i find you. Hygiene is more about the way to take care of yourself. A girl’s nails, hair, make-up, scent, breath… all that, I feel a girl who doesn’t take care of some as small as her hygiene, wont be too good at taking care of me.
The shit below this line doesn’t really matter but deff is a plus
Good eye contact
Same taste in music
Freak in da bed
Does all my laundry ;) (jk)